Monday, February 15, 2010

60% is too high

I am so saddened by this article by the BBC. Rape is never the victims fault. This mentality shows why 60% of rapes/sexual assaults are not reported to the police, according to a statistical average of the past 5 years (Bureau of Justice Statistics. Rape and Sexual Assault: Reporting to Police and Medical Attention.1992-2000.)

Rape victims 'to blame' - survey

A majority of women believe some rape victims should take responsibility for what happened, a survey suggests.

Almost three quarters of the women who believed this said if a victim got into bed with the assailant before an attack they should accept some responsibility.

One-third blamed victims who had dressed provocatively or gone back to the attacker's house for a drink.

The survey of more than 1,000 people in London marked the 10th anniversary of the Haven service for rape victims.

More than half of those of both sexes questioned said there were some circumstances when a rape victim should accept responsibility for an attack.

Less forgiving

The study found that women were less forgiving of the victim than men.

Of the women who believed some victims should take responsibility, 71% thought a person should accept responsibility when getting into bed with someone, compared with 57% of men.

Elizabeth Harrison from Haven said there was never an excuse for forcing a woman to do something she did not want to.

"Clearly, women are in a position where they need to take responsibility for themselves - but whatever you wear and whatever you do does not give somebody else the right to rape you.

"It's important people take the time to actually look at what they are doing and make sure the person they are with is actually wanting to go ahead with what they are proposing."

The survey also found more than one in 10 people were unsure whether they would report being raped to the police, and 2% said they would definitely not do so.

The main reasons were being too embarrassed or ashamed (55%), wanting to forget it had happened (41%) and not wanting to go to court (38%).

Meanwhile, the survey suggested that many people are relaxed about their safety. Almost half of people have walked home via side streets on their own.

One in five has been so drunk they have lost their memory, while one in five has got into a taxi without checking whether it is licensed.

Hardening attitudes

When asked about their own experiences, more than a third of those polled said they had been in a situation where they could have been made to have sex against their will.

Women are more likely to have been in this situation - 40% compared to 20%.

And one in five adults had been in a situation where they were made to have sex when they did not want to. This had happened to more women (23%) than men (20%).

It is depressing that people are still quick to blame the victim of rape rather than placing the responsibility where it actually belongs - squarely on the shoulders of the perpetrator
Kate Allen Amnesty International

The online survey, titled Wake Up To Rape, polled 1,061 people aged 18 to 50, comprising 712 women and 349 men.

An Amnesty International report five years ago found that a significant minority of British people laid the blame for rape at victims themselves.

BBC home affairs correspondent Danny Shaw says this latest study suggests attitudes may have hardened. And the findings may help explain why juries are reluctant to convict in some rape trials.

Amnesty International's UK director Kate Allen said the new findings were "alarming but sadly not surprising".

"It is depressing that, nearly half a decade later, people are still quick to blame the victim of rape rather than placing the responsibility where it actually belongs - squarely on the shoulders of the perpetrator," she said.

"The government has announced that it will develop an 'integrated strategy' to tackle violence against women and these findings are another reminder of how urgent this is and how proper training, support and resourcing will be vital in making it a reality."

The Home Office said it had introduced a number of measures to the service provided to rape victims, including new police and prosecutors' guidance, monitoring of services and funding for support for rape victims.

A spokeswoman said: "The government is determined to ensure that every victim has immediate access to the services and support they need so that more victims have the confidence to come forward and report these crimes and we can bring the perpetrators to justice."

Story from BBC NEWS:

Published: 2010/02/15 14:04:32 GMT

Friday, February 5, 2010

Winter Storm Essentials

We are preparing for an awesome snow storm today. I heard a kid in my building exclaim "We are going to have snow coming out our butt!" I can't help disagree with that statement, but who am I to argue with the kid. It could happen. All I heard all day is how much snow we are getting. It's going to be a snow-pocalypse apparently so we should all get the essentials and be prepared. As for me...
I have a good red wine,
I have bread,
I have eggs,
I have milk (oh wait that is buttermilk, and it is spoiled. Ugh),
I have netflix,
I have reading...plenty of reading in my case,
and I have the cute snuggly animals to keep me warm at night.

Before it became too crazy out, I was able to take the Magster for a walk and get a few snaps.

...Maggie enjoying the snow...

...and the end result for the evening...

I hope you all stay warm and safe tonight!

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Yeah, it is a whiney butt post

I think there are two types of people in this world. There are the ones that can look at themselves and say "yeah, that's me" or they don't. It is difficult to be one of those people who truly can judge themselves for who they truly are. It is damn frightening at times. I have realized that lately, I have tried to ignore who I am, make fucking excuses about how I got into the life I have right now. About how it is the world's fault, people's fault, my family's fault. But God forbid I ever put the blame on myself. I have always been able to look at my faults and I can see them as plain as day. This has always made therapy a chore because why the hell am I going to pay someone to try to figure out my faults when I can tell you what they are? The few times I did go, I would just get frustrated and leave more irritated than when I came. It is just so much easier to look past what I could do to fix things and just hope someone would fix them for me. The last time I really took proactive strides in fixing the whole friendship area of my life I was essentially screwed over and then shat upon. It has been almost a year since that has happened and I haven't left this funk since. It happened, and I am just being the eternal baby whining about how it hurt me and how I am never going to have true friends, and blah blah blah, waa waa waa. I know it is time. I either need step up or step off. I know what I did to cause the scenario to play out. It is surprising to think that whole event has caused me to pretty much withdraw socially. Oh well, life happens. I am not any less of a person for it. I am ready to move on to this new phase in my life.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Monday, June 29, 2009

What's in a Name?

Wow two posts in one day. I must REALLY be procrastinating...

So I have decided that I need to name my cell phone. It is not only my only means of speaking with the outside world, it is also my camera, my alarm clock, and calendar. We naturally have a love/hate relationship. It causes me to wake up in the morning, and to be connected to the world at. all. times. The two things I hate to do. Yet, the camera on it rocks compared to my old camera and actually to my digital camera which I just found recently.

Since I will not be getting this phone out of my life anytime soon (I usually keep phones until I am eligible for a new one), I figured that a name would be appropriate. I keep thinking Remington, just because I love that name and could call it Remy for short. However, my ex co-worker named her (now) dead fish Remy and I think it is too soon to steal that name. I am happily taking any suggestions, just leave a comment with your name idea!

Newport, Rhode Island

So I finally made it to New England. What a lovely lovely place.

I wish I had more time to spend there. It seemed almost silly to spend 16 hours in the car to get there, and only have 23 hours to enjoy the town. It was actually less than that because 6 hours were spent sleeping and 5 hours were spent at a beautiful little wedding.

Overall, I was able to get a small taste of the east coast and now I have a desire to get back. All of the farms, and untouched beaches, and the food. Oh, I am just salivating thinking about it! Of course I was unable to experience all of the items mentioned above, but I was able to go on a nice hike after the wedding. It has been a while since I have shared posted anything new on here. So here are a few pictures from my trusty little cell phone of my 24 hour trip to Newport Rhode Island.
I hope everyone's summer is going well. Mine has been incredibly eventful. I have several topics I will have to share when I get the inspiration to write it all down. House buying horror stories, glorified camping tales, and triathlons are are all ahead.

My house is still completely dysfunctional because we are in the midst of packing. Which makes it difficult to stay at home for any long period of time. Jake and I get home and begin making excuses for why we need to leave. This summer has been completely unproductive yet busy all at the same time. I am pretty sure this is going to bite me on the bottom when it is time to actually move, but I have never had a nice, calm and normal move. They are always the type of moves where you throw everything into boxes and hope to god that you haven't forgotten or break something. And every time I end up breaking or forgetting something.

Hopefully, the next time I post I will be talking about my new house and how much I love it. Until then take care and have a wonderful summer.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Camping trip #1

Knitting mittens by the campfire while drinking homemade strawberry lemonade, followed by an evening of a smore eating contest ::with myself::. What else could be more perfect? Maybe doing it all over again this weekend? Oh, I can't wait! Have I ever told you all how much I love summer?
I would have had more pictures but my craptastic phone crapped out on me. I don't mean that, I love my phone but I have a nasty habit of not plugging it in at night. Which means about once every two weeks or so my phone is dead and I have no means of communication to the outside world, which I happen to love but my husband hates. This inevitably leads to the argument "What if something bad were to happen and no one could get a hold of you?" To which my response is a gigantic eye roll and shrug.
In other events, Jake and I will be closing on our first home next week. I haven't mentioned this yet because it has been a long up-hill battle to get this house. I still do not believe this is actually happening, but it seems as though everything is in place for us to start moving next weekend! ::crossing fingers and wishing on a star:: However, since I have been purging and boxing up the vast crap of clutter that is my life right now I came across...MY CAMERA! Which I was extremely excited about until I dropped it while putting in batteries and now it has a single battery stuck in the wrong slot and I can get another one in! So, it seems that I will be continue to use my cell phone as my camera...which means more battery usage...which means more phone dying incidents...which means more "nag..nag...nag..." It is my little self-fulfilling prophecy. Anyway, I hope you all had a wonderful holiday weekend with lots of outdoor fun.